TRULY KENYAN AU SIO?
[b][b]1. You unwrap all your gifts carefully, so that you
can re-use the wrapping. Ama you tumia it to cover
your potted plants in the digz or cover your meza in
the jikoni.
2. You don't have genuine containers or utensils,
you only use margarine, ice-cream and yoghurt
mikebes. (Blue band, Kasuku, Kimbo, mallo, Lyons
Maid)
3. You call an older person you've never met before
'uncle' or 'aunty.' "auntie, unashuka," "uncle si
nikuvukishe baro?"
4. More than 90,sorry 95% of the music CD's and
cassettes in your digz are illegal or pirated
copies. (done in Dubai ,kariokor base or Rivarodi)
5. Your backyard or store is always full of stuff
because you never throw anything away, just in case
you need it som eday. (a gum boot without a partner,
njumu ya left ya sandak zile za tenee and the baby
walker - the baby now 12 and you are 40)
6. You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottle
(mikebe tupu) from your stays at hotels (Sarova
shaba , whitesands, Sirikwa...) and also the tu
flamingo sabuni soaps that are usually offered in
the lodges. Most of them ni zile umechanua. It's
kenya anyway.
7. You have almost always overweight baggage when
travelling by plane. (Taking unga ya jogoo, Omena,
Royco, sugarcane, arrowroots and githeri to 'uncle'
Paul in the U.S. !)
8. If a store has a limit on the quantity of a
product, then each member of the family will join
separate queues to purchase the maximum quantity
possible. (Mumias sugar during a shortage)
9. All children have annoying nicknames. (bebi, toi,
boi, kadogo, nyako, rembo, doli, mamie, dadie, toto,
kanono, twig)
10. Nobody in your family informs you that they are
coming over for a visit. Uncle, wife, sis-in-law,
two nephews and mboch have camped at home from
Wesdan-(Western)
11. You sanya, mints and toothpicks at restaurants.
( Murray mints, wrappers, and chumvi shakers,
serviettes!)
12. Your mathee has a minor disagreement with her
sister and she has not talked to her for almost 10
years. (nisikie mkiongea ama mkicheza na watoto wake
- mtaniona)
13. You only make telephone calls at a cheaper rate
at night. (Ati economy ni mbaya!)
14. You teach your friends swear words in your
language. (jinga, fala, shenzi wallahi billahi, aki
ya ngai, n yasai kende mrembe mno ingoho!)
15. You never have less than 50 people to meet you
at the airport or see you off even if it is a local
flight. (Yeah, my relas from Shamakhokho have hired
a minibus to see me off to Lokichoggio. - 1st person
to fly in the family, that's why)
16. You keep changing your Internet Service Provider
because the first month is free you surf for the
first free month and then when it is time to start
paying, you dissapear (I have proof, I know some
jamaas.....)
17. Office supplies mysteriously find their way to
your home.(Makasis, biros, mastamps, stapler ya
mdosi, makaratasis glue etc,etc.)
18. You don't buy a printer because it is Cheaper to
do it at your work place where it is free. (kudowea
Yawenyewe!)
19. You wash your car on a Sunday. (Yeah reading the
paper sitting on a kamawe in tu baggy shorts) even
if you don't have one, you usually spend most of
your time imagining that you have one.
20. Weddings never start at the appointed time.
(three hours later, African time: Better late than
never) food is majimaji (kitoweo), salt is NEVER
enough)
21. You always lie about the ages of your children
if they have to pay higher admission fees."Hapana,
haka katoto kangu ni kasweet sixteen"and yet he has
beards all over. ( Nairobi Show)
22. When you are young, your parents buy you clothes
at least two types and too big so that they would
last longer.
23. At least one of yo! ur uncles is a teacher.
24. You have a 10 kg bag of rice in the kitchen.
(Basmati from Mwea)
25. You always read first the Sport sections of the
Sunday newspaper that you have ombad the vendor (Ati
wacha ni cheki headlines za ball tu! (especially
jamas!)
26.You always love shopping at Uchumi strictly
during the End month and at the mid month. Reason:
End of month sales. Ati mapromo!
So then am a real Kenyan and am proud of that. Are
you...?[/b][/b]
Check out my site: http://www.infoke.com
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