http://infoke.com/ Fri, 10 Sep 2010 04:14:45 +0200 MyBB http://infoke.com/Thread-Kenya-aggressively-advertising-on-CNN Sun, 02 Aug 2009 08:45:59 +0200 http://infoke.com/Thread-Kenya-aggressively-advertising-on-CNN
Angola and South africa have also responded swiftly.]]>
Angola and South africa have also responded swiftly.]]> http://infoke.com/Thread-kenyan-english-accent-best-in-africa Sun, 02 Aug 2009 08:42:32 +0200 http://infoke.com/Thread-kenyan-english-accent-best-in-africa
have you had a chance to hear girls fresh from high school speak English?you'd love their raw accents.]]>
have you had a chance to hear girls fresh from high school speak English?you'd love their raw accents.]]> http://infoke.com/Thread-TRULY-KENYAN-AU-SIO Fri, 10 Apr 2009 17:08:50 +0200 http://infoke.com/Thread-TRULY-KENYAN-AU-SIO [b][b]1. You unwrap all your gifts carefully, so that you

can re-use the wrapping. Ama you tumia it to cover

your potted plants in the digz or cover your meza in

the jikoni.

2. You don't have genuine containers or utensils,

you only use margarine, ice-cream and yoghurt

mikebes. (Blue band, Kasuku, Kimbo, mallo, Lyons

Maid)



3. You call an older person you've never met before

'uncle' or 'aunty.' "auntie, unashuka," "uncle si

nikuvukishe baro?"

4. More than 90,sorry 95% of the music CD's and

cassettes in your digz are illegal or pirated

copies. (done in Dubai ,kariokor base or Rivarodi)



5. Your backyard or store is always full of stuff

because you never throw anything away, just in case

you need it som eday. (a gum boot without a partner,

njumu ya left ya sandak zile za tenee and the baby

walker - the baby now 12 and you are 40)



6. You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottle

(mikebe tupu) from your stays at hotels (Sarova

shaba , whitesands, Sirikwa...) and also the tu

flamingo sabuni soaps that are usually offered in

the lodges. Most of them ni zile umechanua. It's

kenya anyway.



7. You have almost always overweight baggage when

travelling by plane. (Taking unga ya jogoo, Omena,

Royco, sugarcane, arrowroots and githeri to 'uncle'

Paul in the U.S. !)



8. If a store has a limit on the quantity of a

product, then each member of the family will join

separate queues to purchase the maximum quantity

possible. (Mumias sugar during a shortage)



9. All children have annoying nicknames. (bebi, toi,

boi, kadogo, nyako, rembo, doli, mamie, dadie, toto,

kanono, twig)



10. Nobody in your family informs you that they are

coming over for a visit. Uncle, wife, sis-in-law,

two nephews and mboch have camped at home from

Wesdan-(Western)



11. You sanya, mints and toothpicks at restaurants.

( Murray mints, wrappers, and chumvi shakers,

serviettes!)



12. Your mathee has a minor disagreement with her

sister and she has not talked to her for almost 10

years. (nisikie mkiongea ama mkicheza na watoto wake

- mtaniona)



13. You only make telephone calls at a cheaper rate

at night. (Ati economy ni mbaya!)



14. You teach your friends swear words in your

language. (jinga, fala, shenzi wallahi billahi, aki

ya ngai, n yasai kende mrembe mno ingoho!)



15. You never have less than 50 people to meet you

at the airport or see you off even if it is a local

flight. (Yeah, my relas from Shamakhokho have hired

a minibus to see me off to Lokichoggio. - 1st person

to fly in the family, that's why)



16. You keep changing your Internet Service Provider

because the first month is free you surf for the

first free month and then when it is time to start

paying, you dissapear (I have proof, I know some

jamaas.....)



17. Office supplies mysteriously find their way to

your home.(Makasis, biros, mastamps, stapler ya

mdosi, makaratasis glue etc,etc.)



18. You don't buy a printer because it is Cheaper to

do it at your work place where it is free. (kudowea

Yawenyewe!)



19. You wash your car on a Sunday. (Yeah reading the

paper sitting on a kamawe in tu baggy shorts) even

if you don't have one, you usually spend most of

your time imagining that you have one.



20. Weddings never start at the appointed time.

(three hours later, African time: Better late than

never) food is majimaji (kitoweo), salt is NEVER

enough)

21. You always lie about the ages of your children

if they have to pay higher admission fees."Hapana,

haka katoto kangu ni kasweet sixteen"and yet he has

beards all over. ( Nairobi Show)



22. When you are young, your parents buy you clothes

at least two types and too big so that they would

last longer.



23. At least one of yo! ur uncles is a teacher.



24. You have a 10 kg bag of rice in the kitchen.

(Basmati from Mwea)



25. You always read first the Sport sections of the

Sunday newspaper that you have ombad the vendor (Ati

wacha ni cheki headlines za ball tu! (especially

jamas!)



26.You always love shopping at Uchumi strictly

during the End month and at the mid month. Reason:

End of month sales. Ati mapromo!



So then am a real Kenyan and am proud of that. Are

you...?[/b][/b]]]> [b][b]1. You unwrap all your gifts carefully, so that you

can re-use the wrapping. Ama you tumia it to cover

your potted plants in the digz or cover your meza in

the jikoni.

2. You don't have genuine containers or utensils,

you only use margarine, ice-cream and yoghurt

mikebes. (Blue band, Kasuku, Kimbo, mallo, Lyons

Maid)



3. You call an older person you've never met before

'uncle' or 'aunty.' "auntie, unashuka," "uncle si

nikuvukishe baro?"

4. More than 90,sorry 95% of the music CD's and

cassettes in your digz are illegal or pirated

copies. (done in Dubai ,kariokor base or Rivarodi)



5. Your backyard or store is always full of stuff

because you never throw anything away, just in case

you need it som eday. (a gum boot without a partner,

njumu ya left ya sandak zile za tenee and the baby

walker - the baby now 12 and you are 40)



6. You have a collection of miniature shampoo bottle

(mikebe tupu) from your stays at hotels (Sarova

shaba , whitesands, Sirikwa...) and also the tu

flamingo sabuni soaps that are usually offered in

the lodges. Most of them ni zile umechanua. It's

kenya anyway.



7. You have almost always overweight baggage when

travelling by plane. (Taking unga ya jogoo, Omena,

Royco, sugarcane, arrowroots and githeri to 'uncle'

Paul in the U.S. !)



8. If a store has a limit on the quantity of a

product, then each member of the family will join

separate queues to purchase the maximum quantity

possible. (Mumias sugar during a shortage)



9. All children have annoying nicknames. (bebi, toi,

boi, kadogo, nyako, rembo, doli, mamie, dadie, toto,

kanono, twig)



10. Nobody in your family informs you that they are

coming over for a visit. Uncle, wife, sis-in-law,

two nephews and mboch have camped at home from

Wesdan-(Western)



11. You sanya, mints and toothpicks at restaurants.

( Murray mints, wrappers, and chumvi shakers,

serviettes!)



12. Your mathee has a minor disagreement with her

sister and she has not talked to her for almost 10

years. (nisikie mkiongea ama mkicheza na watoto wake

- mtaniona)



13. You only make telephone calls at a cheaper rate

at night. (Ati economy ni mbaya!)



14. You teach your friends swear words in your

language. (jinga, fala, shenzi wallahi billahi, aki

ya ngai, n yasai kende mrembe mno ingoho!)



15. You never have less than 50 people to meet you

at the airport or see you off even if it is a local

flight. (Yeah, my relas from Shamakhokho have hired

a minibus to see me off to Lokichoggio. - 1st person

to fly in the family, that's why)



16. You keep changing your Internet Service Provider

because the first month is free you surf for the

first free month and then when it is time to start

paying, you dissapear (I have proof, I know some

jamaas.....)



17. Office supplies mysteriously find their way to

your home.(Makasis, biros, mastamps, stapler ya

mdosi, makaratasis glue etc,etc.)



18. You don't buy a printer because it is Cheaper to

do it at your work place where it is free. (kudowea

Yawenyewe!)



19. You wash your car on a Sunday. (Yeah reading the

paper sitting on a kamawe in tu baggy shorts) even

if you don't have one, you usually spend most of

your time imagining that you have one.



20. Weddings never start at the appointed time.

(three hours later, African time: Better late than

never) food is majimaji (kitoweo), salt is NEVER

enough)

21. You always lie about the ages of your children

if they have to pay higher admission fees."Hapana,

haka katoto kangu ni kasweet sixteen"and yet he has

beards all over. ( Nairobi Show)



22. When you are young, your parents buy you clothes

at least two types and too big so that they would

last longer.



23. At least one of yo! ur uncles is a teacher.



24. You have a 10 kg bag of rice in the kitchen.

(Basmati from Mwea)



25. You always read first the Sport sections of the

Sunday newspaper that you have ombad the vendor (Ati

wacha ni cheki headlines za ball tu! (especially

jamas!)



26.You always love shopping at Uchumi strictly

during the End month and at the mid month. Reason:

End of month sales. Ati mapromo!



So then am a real Kenyan and am proud of that. Are

you...?[/b][/b]]]>